April Poetry Month
Did you know that April is ‘Poetry Month’?
Well, WIFSFBA Board member Julie Rubio knows and wrote a poem sparked by reflection on the long-term work and love she’s put into her latest directing project, TAMARA – The Untold Story of Tamara de Lempicka and the Art of Survival.
Now in the process of seeking finishing funds to complete her film, Julie continually pushes her ‘value’ into her work expecting to receive the payoff for her efforts: money to finish a work of art she needs to share with the world.
She must wait for someone else to help, to see HER and help…but what she can’t stop thinking is “maybe the movie isn’t good enough…maybe I’m not good enough to make this film happen.”
Looking to the outside has left her expectations largely unmet. But is believing her ‘value’ isn’t enough to achieve success missing the point?
That’s when Julie sat down and wrote…
With a muse working through her, “Waiting To Be Seen” took only 20 minutes to spill onto the page. When asked about her reaction to completing the poem, Julie said she “felt like she had gotten a little monster in her ear off her shoulder as she realized she doesn’t have to wait for the world to ‘see’ or value her – she SEES herself, and she’s definitely ENOUGH.”
Creating is where her value lives and thrives.
Waiting To Be Seen
She places her hand on the lens, snapping it into the camera.
Looking through it, she wishes her eyes could become lenses.
Rotating that fragile piece of glass, she can now see her reflection.
She mutters under her voice, "Please see me."
She places the camera down and sighs,
Tired not from working but from waiting for money to rain from the sky.
For the gods to hear her.
Once again waiting for the phone to ring, the email to come,
For all the pots to finally finish cooking, waiting for her turn to eat,
To be told "Yes," the red stoplight has turned to a green-light.
Ready to say, "Roll sound, roll camera--Action!"
Always ready, yet so tired from always being overlooked.
Never complaining, standing tall, forging forward,
Believing, fighting for that dream.
Yet once again, overlooked.
Don’t give up, just do it, go for it! It will happen.
Hoping, yet once again overlooked.
She picks up the camera, takes off the lens, sits down like a good girl.
"Wait your turn, don’t be loud, be seen not heard."
Taking all the underestimation, marginalization,
Every dragon, hate, sorrow, pain,
And making the anger into a beautiful power of creation,
That only helps make her stronger.
With more energy, she places a new clear lens on the camera,
Slings that camera over her shoulder, holding the weight of her world.
She walks to the mirror and snaps a picture of herself,
Looks at it, finally being seen by the real judge,
The real eyes that have ever really mattered.
Realizing she is no longer overlooked,
And no longer waiting to be seen.
~ Julie Rubio
Did any thoughts come up for you after reading Julie’s poem?
Maybe about work, your ‘art’, personal life, creativity, how you see yourself in the industry? Whatever those thoughts may be, if you want to share them, others in our WIFchat Facebook group might benefit from hearing them. Click below to share!
Director | Filmmaker
East Meets West Productions